Learning from the hard things to hear

The words of others can have a profound impact on how we perceive ourselves. There have been a few things that I can clearly recall that people have said to me that have had a profound impact on my life. Some of these things have been uplifting, affirming and encouraging and others have taken a longer time to process and have required me to really challenge my initial reaction of hurt. Continue Reading

169 Days

On Wednesday 28th of June my Apple Watch move streak came to an end. This story begins in early December 2016 when my beautiful girlfriend Jess bought me an Apple Watch. A hugely generous gift to celebrate the beginning of a new chapter in my life. Continue Reading

The Red Dragon

Last week I had a bit of a scare. My neutrophil count (a white blood cell responsible for fighting infection) had dropped to a pretty low level and as a result the doctors at the hospital thought it would be wisest to cancel my monthly infusion. This caught me off guard for a few reasons.Continue Reading

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Back to the Studio

I am really excited to share with you all that I will recommencing work at a studio on Monday! This will almost be a year to the date from when I was first hospitalised with Still’s. It has been one of the hardest years of my life and I think that is why recommencing work is so exciting and special for me. I will be joining Swell Design Group, a widely respected studio in Canberra. Swell has been incredibly understanding of my circumstance and I am so grateful for the opportunity they are giving me. Continue Reading

Press on

It has been a while since my last check-in post. For a while now I have been avoiding writing about my personal journey directly – preferring to summarise my thoughts about books or articles that I have read. If I am honest, for many months I found it difficult to write. I was struggling with overwhelming feelings, lacking the spark of hope I so desperately wanted to share with you all.Continue Reading

Falling in Love

The other day the commonly used phrase ‘falling in love’ came up in conversation. It had never occurred to me how accurate this phrase was in vividly describing the phenomena. I know what you may be thinking, but unfortunately, this won’t be a deeply romantic and personal post, but rather a post that I hope will encourage you to think as it has made me think.Continue Reading

Comparison, Competition & Contentment

Hello all! I am writing this post from a public computer at the National Library of Australia. The main reading room is very quiet, but the keys of the computer I am writing on are embarrassingly loud… and I am only just finishing the second sentence. Before I start unpacking my primary thoughts for this post, which I have already managed to diverge from, I want to reflect on how fortunate I am to be able to walk into a beautiful building like the National Library, to be safe and to have access to a computer and the internet. This might not seem significant, but this is actually a real privilege because many people do not have access to the quality resources and services that I am afforded. Sometimes it can be so easy to forget how fortunate we are. Before you continue reading, stop for 10 seconds and think about some things in your life that you are thankful for.Continue Reading

What type of wake do you leave?

This last week has been such a big week! I had my last university assignment due last Thursday, my beautiful girlfriend’s birthday on Tuesday, my infusion Tuesday afternoon, preparation for the University of Canberra Graduate showcase on Thursday and Friday and catching up with family and friends over the weekend. I am sitting at my computer writing this post and thinking a self high five is seemingContinue Reading

We are the normals

Yesterday I had my sixth infusion at the hospital, I sat in chair number 13 (which is more often than not the chair I get allocated because no-body else seems to like to sit in it, but it doesn’t bother me). My infusions seem to fall on important daysContinue Reading

Corner Four Relationships

This year has been pretty crazy hard but I am so thankful for the huge blessing, support and encouragement you have all been to me. A few months ago I read a book called the The Power of the Other by Dr. Henry Cloud. I am now rereading this book with a great friend of mine from uni. I wanted to take the time to unpack what I have been learning and to share the important message of the book.Continue Reading

Being “sick” is healing me.

I am so thankful for the last five months. Still’s Disease has given me back my life. I can’t remember being happier than I am now. I am so grateful for the new lease on life I have been given. I use to live a life trying to escape and control everything. Freaking out about the future and constantly worrying about what other people thought of me.Continue Reading

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When getting better is scary

It has been almost a month since my last post… and a lot has happened!

Firstly, I received both approval and started a new biological infusion treatment three weeks ago called tocilizumab: the results have been rapid and incredible. I am gaining energy and have had minimal side effects so far.

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Take me seriously! The Ubiqutious Cry of the Chronically Ill.

I have a few things I want to unpack, process and document tonight, but I won’t be able to get through them all. I was planning on waiting until I had a clear mind but I am struggling to sleep – I am feeling quite sick and the pain throughout my body is not completely deliberating at the moment but very unconformable. So I thought I would process some thoughts on pixels to distract myself and hopefully bring some understanding to a really complicated communication problem.Continue Reading

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3 minutes to protect your time!

It is currently 5AM and I have been wide awake for the past three hours. For my sake, I hope this will be a short post (succinct and eloquent) and that my body will soon decide to provide me with the luxury of sleep. So let’s see how we go and until I succumb to slumber I am super excited to explore the concept of time with you.Continue Reading

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Life is Unpredictable

It has been a few weeks since my last post and I am so excited to have a clear mind this evening to write. I normally have a very clear idea of what I am going to write about but tonight feels more like a candid conversation, a casual catch up, and I am just going to go with the flow.Continue Reading

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Sometimes we need to look back.

It appears that once again sleep will be evading me tonight: as my mind has decided that a post is apparently necessary before it will grant me the pleasure of sleep. Tonight I want to explore the importance of looking back and acknowledging how far you have come. This has been something I have been contemplating over the last couple of days as I reflect on my current recovery journey and more broadly with my early learning difficulties.
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Just stop & slow down!

I find myself both defeated and excited; as my feeble attempts at convincing my body and mind to succumb to sleep means I am currently not asleep (which is a nuisance) but also means I am awake (which is exciting because I am looking forward to writing to you). In this post I want to unpack a situation that really tested my attitude this week and the revelation that it brought to me.Continue Reading

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A (Unexpectedly) great day!

It has been a month since my last post. It has been a really hard month – I started chemo, had an allergic reaction to one of my medications and had to withdraw from uni. This last month has smashed me. I have been feeling constantly sick, nausea, mentally ‘foggy’, depressed and suffering from insomnia. I entered such a dark place where I wanted to give up. I was tired of taking my medication because of how it makes me feel physically and mentally.

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Peripheral Vision

I am so exhausted but I can’t sleep – my mind just won’t shut off. I just have this idea of peripheral vision niggling at me. As many of you know I am a designer – I love discovering more about how we interact with the world and make meaning of it. I was reading a few days ago about how peripheral vision is significantly more critical to decoding our environment than our central focus. Continue Reading

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A heart of thankfulness

This will likely be a short post. I am trying to get my head around everything that is going on and I just need to write it out. I hope that through documenting my thoughts, saying it as it is, someone might be encouraged to keep pushing on with their struggles. We’re a community, a family unit and we need to support one another. Physically and emotionally, I can’t do much at the moment. But hopefully through my writing and sharing my heart I can still be an encourager and supporter.Continue Reading

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An attitude of gratitude

Again I want to begin my post by thanking you all for your support and prayers during this time. I have been incredibly blessed and overwhelmed by the tirelessness of your encouragement.  God has blessed me with such an incredible support network!

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Diagnosis

When life puts you in tough situations, don’t say “why me” say “try me”.

After two weeks of blood tests and physical examinations I was diagnosed with a rare autoimmune disease this week.
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